Bitch just leave me by my lonely.

July 14, 2017

I did it because I thought I wouldn't get caught. You two would never know the same crowd. Of course it didn't mean anything it boils down to me being vulnerable. Entertaining someone else was a better way to spend my time then going back and forth with you about why our relationship isn't blossoming the way we pictured it would. I imagined this world was enormous.. until the day my two lovers crossed paths. Yesterday morning during my work out I attempted to break down the moment our boyfriend/girlfriend decide to take advantage of us.

Play us like fools, what we're all afraid of. Whenever a thought of creeping arises we push it to the back of our minds. Reassuring ourselves our significant other would never betray us that way, put us in that position most importantly they'll never get passed us with the bullshit! Is it when we finally put our guards down?

Explaining the difference between listening to your gut and heart is like when you're a baby and your mom tells you don't touch the iron. We do it anyway because we don't know any better. The iron is your heart. We make decisions listening to our hearts and sometimes we get stung. 

I'm not the type to look through phones or ask for passwords because it's unhealthy and the quickest way to start an argument. If you're debating to look through your significant others text messages or social media are you better off leaving already? Or do you wait until you find what you've been looking for? Realize we are in control of neither of those things. Your gut will never sugar coat what is reality. Most of the time it's things we don't want to hear or worse.. what we already know but chose to ignore.  

I was under the impression we were passed being untruthful in our relationship whether the lie was big or small. When someone shows you their true colors believe them the first time. Someone changing their ways isn't guaranteed their first, second or third chance. A concept I struggled with more than once. This time I'm deciding to put myself first. Bitch just leave me by my lonely.

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