Love trials vs Friend zone

July 24, 2017

There was only one time in my life I was struck with more than a crush without knowing much. The restaurant was hectic but you walking in turned everything peaceful. For the first time an all you can eat buffet lost my interest. We made eye contact for a second and you continued celebrating. There's no award for the way your dress was complimenting every curve on your temple. Flipping my camera to selfie mode I made sure the collar on my tommy polo was down and my hair was fine because you're the one I want to impress. Wishing there was a drink on the menu that was equivalent to drinking the sunlight in your skin. Admiring your lip gloss I day dreamed you sucking my ex girlfriends name out of my mouth. To eradicate her coming up in our conversations. How was it possible to fantasize about someone I never met? You had the audacity to be beautiful on a rainy day. I was thinking about you like clouds think about pouring.

It's not that I don't want to know every detail about you. If I had to step up for you to follow my lead then I would do just that. Being upfront has gotten me everything I've ever wanted out of life how could things be different when it comes to you? 

One of the best conversations starters I've heard this year.."Nina remember the girl with the big butt?" The only appropriate response was "How could I forget?! What about her?" A short pause, casual shrug and gigantic smiles later he said "Nothing it randomly crossed my mind." 

Big butts.. We see them every day (I aim for the stars and cross my fingers for more than once a day.) If someone brings your butt back up a week later it surpasses a compliment!

Overhearing a game of 21 questions one of her sentences began with "My boyfriend.." No sweat after she insisted the boy she just met add her on snapchat.

"She started talking about her boyfriend but I don't want to hear about that. For now I'm going to be her friend because I can't jump straight in. She wouldn't talk to me anymore. When he starts messing up and she's talking to me about it then I'm going to take her."

I was curious to know whether he confessed his interest in her butt, I mean her. When someone is off the market due to being someone else's lover should you sweep their flirtation under the rug or act upon it? There must be a void if they're opening that door to begin with. If your significant others love is real they've got to handle competition.

Is a relationship more likely to succeed if your friends first? Getting to know someone without an interest being known on both ends can open topics of conversation that could be blocked the other way around. There's no judgement on the struggles we all face every day. You're content with sharing your fears and flaws. Your interests are out in the open versus unfolding as you go. We never realize the importance of being comfortable around someone until we have to fart. The cozy blanket of getting used to someone can also be a complication.

I've been in the position of desiring someone that's emotionally and mentally unavailable. My mind was playing tricks on me. Each hang out left me with another question to add on my what if list. That I was running out of paper for. The chase is exhilarating but it's effortless to ignore what's in front of you when your not looking. Once we see potential in someone it's hard to ignore what could be. 










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